Am I in the wrong relationship ( You Think) or just scared of being alone?
I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years. We have been generally happy together and suit each other well (are told so by everyone around us). Even though I was the one to make all the first moves and then later asked him to move in with me, I go though periods where I feel that something is missing. I have cheated on him numerous times, some of which he knows about. I don't know if I do these things out of insecurity or selfishness, or if we're just not right for each other. I can't think of what is wrong with our relationship, which makes me think that it is just me and that I need to clean up my act. I don't always feel empty and trapped, but when I do it is quite intense and I feel a need to act on it (be with someone else or ask for an open relationship). I haven't been single for 5 years, (have been in other relationship) and don't know what it's like to be alone.. I feel so confused and unable to judge the situation. I long for the freedom of being single but am scared as well, and don't want to ruin what could be a great relationship. So basically, is the problem with Me or Him???
- Asked by An Alternative Girl, Female, 22-25, Melbourne, Student
Answered by ME....BELIEVER
Okay I know I am Yank from the US but as I have traveled extensively 30 plus countries and counting all but one continent and there are a few issues that find to be certain. That when it comes to the issues of love lost and won, fidelity -vs- infidelity, passion, pain, joy and confusiont these emotions know no geographic boundary lines. When it comes to the heart,love, lust and all other emotions the scenario and the outcome are all just about the same. You know the answer and whether it is fear, lack of active brain cells, low self-esteem or just plain laziness. Does it really matter where the blames is placed (although numerous affairs does lend itself to culpability) you are in a no win relationship and if you loved this man you would allow him to be in a loving, honest, nurturing faithful girlfriend with morals
Perhaps the next time up to plate you might try practicing with a purpose, self-love, restraint, A Belief that you were born with a purpose. That purpose does not focus on sexual acts before marriage. You are correct you do need to clean up your act. There is a way not to feel empty and trapped. You might try Jesus along with self-restarint.
Look you are 22 years old a whole lifetime ahead of you concentrate of living life well.